About Me

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i'm Kassandra an oregon girl at heart. recent college graduate. heading off to law school in summer of 2014. my parents are both u.s. army veterans and continue to serve in the military in other capacities. i have four brothers (two older, two younger) and three sisters (all younger). i love each of them for both their individuality and their commitment to the example set by our parents. aside from my family, i have several friends who mean a great deal to me, one as much as my best friend from high school. she's my kindred spirit and i would do anything for her. i would also do anything for Julie, my roommate for three of my four years of college and my best friend; she's amazing and it's wonderful to have shared this experience with her. i'm extremely strong in academics and tend to think of things in analytical terms. i'm open and honest. note: i'm interested in receiving feedback on this blog, but i request that the comments pertain to the actual blog itself, and i do not approve anonymous comments.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

My Internet is for Recreation

i am an adolescent girl who has visited social and commentary websites for well over four years now. i enjoy meeting people, and talking and debating common interests. this remains interesting as long as these conversations are civil, non-profane and without insult. this is what makes the internet recreational and fun.

however, there are several people on the internet who treat this recreation as seriously as real life.

there are those who feel they cannot get their point(s) across without a barrage of insults, profanity and false accusations regarding the character of the subject. this is a sign that people take the internet much too seriously.

there is a great irony amongst these people, referred to often as "trolls" or "haters." they use terms like "misinformed," "ignorant" and "immature." the true irony is that these people are projecting the same qualities while simultaneously using those terms. it's quite ironic when they are the ones, in fact. using the term "hypocrite."

the vast majority of these people are instigators who, while they claim to advocate peaceful conversations, they make it abundantly clear that they will not be happy without some sort of disagreement, argument or fight.

there is no negotiating with these people to an acceptable civil conclusion.

after the time i've spent conversing with people over the internet, i've come to the assessment that in the grand scheme of things the mindsets of these individuals is just not important.

in the united states we are struggling to deal with the worst economic recession in several decades, fighting two wars, attempting to control our borders from illegal immigrants, and pressing for an effective answer to the most devastating man-made disaster in the country's history in the gulf of mexico. that's just the tip of the iceberg; there are a slew of other local, national and international issues facing our citizens as well.

so in looking at the big picture, are comments courtesy of these internet instigators really all that important? anyone with any measure of an education would answer that in the negative.

so why do the instigators continue? is there some reason they can't enter reasonable society? are they taking the internet too seriously?

in my opinion, the third question is the most likely. i view the internet as i view going to a theater to see a movie. it can be a nice diversion for a couple of hours, but it's no substitute for real life. the internet, like a movie, takes you away from reality for a while, but when it's done you go back and live in the real world. that's all there is to it.

it's baffling why these instigators of negativity would spend their recreational time desparetely trying to drum up controversy. it seems that's the only form of entertainment they have at their disposals.

i choose not to live like that. there are so many more important things in life with which to deal. in the past i have engaged some of these people in their debates. i've since discovered this is seldom, if at all, productive. my likely responses to this now include blocking those who are vulgar or offensive, or completely ignoring those with whom there can be no peaceful resolution.

i strive to be as positive as possible whenever i can. i do this in the hopes that i may provide an optimistic outcome rather than to contribute to the problem. i've learned many, many things from my parents. in dealing with the issue of internet instigators i always remember one lesson in particular: "be part of the solution, not part of the problem." that's one of the best lessons i will ever have learned in my life, provided i adhere to it.

it is said that a lesson in futility means doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. continuing to engage these instigators is just that. there is no changing their mind and, if i feel i am correct, there should be no reason for me to change mine. continuing to engage would be to expect a different result from the same thing. it makes no sense.

perhaps the band Love and Theft have an applicable point in the chorus in its song, Dancing in Circles:

"why do we go dancing in circles when we know it never ends. we get so close, so close to living this way. we come so close to loving each other like sisters and brothers and we go dancing in circles again."

this shouts out the lesson in futility, a lesson from which i am proud to have learned. i choose to not play that game.

i am not always correct. in fact, i wouldn't want to be. being correct is not how a person learns. rather, we learn from our mistakes and wrongness. i have no problem with that and, to that end, strive to be the first to admit when i am wrong. the humility i have learned in my short life has given me that.

why should i engage the instigators? the mere fact of the matter is that i should not. they are an anchor weighing down the vessel of recreation of the internet. i choose not to enable their negativity.

that is why i will choose to ignore these people; not because i believe i am better than them, not because i am giving myself accolades for being correct, and not because i think i am the only one who has a right to contribute to a conversation or forum.

i choose to ignore the instigators because i choose to spend my recreational time in a more positive, interesting and fun manner. that is my reasoning; anyone who would tell you differently is misinformed.

additionally, i would not force my course(s) of action on others. that's not my right. if there are others who choose to do the same, that's their decision and they have their own reasoning behind it. that is their decision to make for themselves. if others choose do react differently, that's their decision as well, and i respect that.

i, for one, choose to do this because i believe there are more important things with which to occupy my recreational time over the internet rather than deal those people who'd rather insult, downgrade and fight.

that may be important to them. it is not important to me.

~ Kassandra


  1. Kassandra:

    You have made a very good website and wrote a wonderful article.

    You have a great mind. keep it blossoming with hard work and correcting mistakes. You are right, like the Trailblazers you learn by adversities. I go by the theory that life is the school or book and the everyday experience is the lessons in life. you can learn and go on or continue doing the same thing with the same results. (hmmmm, didn't I just read that somewhere LOL.)

    My biggest problem is not trying to advance with my emotions or thoughts but more of the problem of two steps forward and one back and other times one step forward and two back to the point that you feel like you are spinning your wheels. or(dancing in circles.) Nevertheless I feel very strongly as long as you have your direction figured out, it does not matter how long it takes you to get there as long as you keep working at it. Hmmmm like the Blazers again. Is it not funny that I have the same Philosophy in my life that I do for the Blazers.

    Posting on Blogs for me is not just recreation, but also a chance to communicate and expand my mind. I am a horrible hand writer. It looks worst then chicken scratching. I have a speech impediment from being born with bad hearing. Therefore with bad hearing and a speech defect, I spent many years in silence. But when all seemed lost, I found the keyboard returned to collage and got an associates degree in computer science. In writing, I found out I could communicate my feelings quite well on a keyboard because people could read what I wrote, and I could write about the lessons that I learned in life where the younger set could just write about them without the feelings that goes with them. Then I found the blogs and started putting my feelings down and I have been hooked ever since.

    I still feel very inferior because of my bad hearing and speech impediments, but modern science with good hearing aids and writing with a keyboard, a good spelling check and sentence structure editing in words and excel no one can tell. In fact you told me I wasn't inferior and that makes me feel very good.

    Keeps your life going in the direction you chose and you will someday be among the greatest. You are quite refreshing to me because I see so many drop-outs, druggers and not having any direction that it is just sad to watch. Maybe that is why I give the impression of worshipping you.

    Thanks for being a true friend, and maybe a strange friend. That is meant in a good way.


  2. Kassandra:

    Along with the hard hearing and speech defect comes a lot of mocking and taunting much the same as you would get from being completely deaf and dumb.

    This is not meant to be crying on your shoulder, but merely pointing out why Phi Slamma and EO remarks has a tendency to take me back. But I am doing great am not letting them bother me.

    For terminology sake, Hate is not the opposite of love to me. Hate is a negative passion and the opposite of love is being indifferent. So in my book Phi Slamma might say love me or hate me but don't be indifference to me because I can't handle that.

  3. I wrote another comment to you, but it might have been lost in cyber space.

    I more or less wanted to explain that along with the hearing defect and speech impediment comes a lot of mocking, laughing at and taunting. It used to bother me quite a bit and would try to physically destroy the one’s that taunted since I felt I didn't have the mentality to do so. The last fight like that was about fifty years ago. I ended up in jail then court and had to promise the Judge that I would walk away from the people that taunted. I learned to do that by finally realizing that people are going to be people and I can't stop them from being cruel, but I can refuse to be a part of it. Although I get overly protective of Travis and defend him way to much, I realize I can't do anything about it.

    The other thing I wanted to explain is my definitions of terms. To keep my mind straight Love is acceptance, Hate is not the opposite of love but a negative passion. Indifference is the opposite of love. My feelings about Phi Slamma are he doesn't care if you love him or hate him just don't be indifference about him.

    This is my reasoning for not responding to Phi Slamma personally. I had to learn to walk away and not be a part of a taunting game.


  4. so what you're saying is, by ignoring his comments, i'm doing exactly what he does NOT want? that's kind of ironic i guess, but that's all right with me. however, it's not my reason for ignoring he nor EA.

    unlike the current frame of the blog, i have no alter ego from real life to internet. what you see here is who i am in reality. in either forum, i find it unnecessary to change my persona. if i want to say something, i say it. i am forthright and honest. you appear to be the same. that's why i appreciate you and our conversations.

    ~ Kassandra

  5. It is true that what you hear is what you get. I use spelling check. that makes me look smarter then I am so I thank Micro Soft word for that. You are a pretty cool person that I love to communicat with because I feel I can be myself without fear.